Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
