weddingsv make me drug and hornr
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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