Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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