For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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