ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.