thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
