Sry I called you an 8
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
