What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
we're making bets on your personal life
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
