At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Randomize
