He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
