Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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