Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.