after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize