JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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