your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
