Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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