her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
