he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
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I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
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And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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