so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
