I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
