I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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