feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
