Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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