I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Couch. On fire.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
