And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
