woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize