we have officially mastered the walk of shame
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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