Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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