he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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