spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
This is my life. Enjoy the view
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
