I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
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There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
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I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize