They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Randomize
