I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize