Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
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While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hospital has no fireball
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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