It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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