Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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