He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
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Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
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Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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