She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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