I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
