if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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