I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
