I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
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We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
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Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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