But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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