Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
