Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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