We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
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