put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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