Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
