ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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