with your own penis?
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I should be sponsored by Trojan
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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