I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
