did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
